Five Great Quotations about Readers
5 Great Sci-fi Story Ideas

Hint at protagonist's internal motivations

Merely presenting College-co-edshoulder-length-chestnut-brown-hairheight-5-foot-3weight-110-poundspeachy-complexio-852558013a protagonist who will solve the story’s main problem the isn’t enough. Instead, you need to give reasons why the protagonist would even want to do so.

Usually authors offer external motivations– it’s his job, he needs to save his loved one, lots of people will die. But authors also ought to deliver, or at least hint at, the protagonist’s internal motivations to get involved. This is done to increase suspense and tension because the protagonist then has more than a mundane reason for acting. After all, a detective would handle every one of his murder cases by the book, but when the victim is a testifying witness that put away a killer in one of the detective’s past cases, then it’s personal…especially when a second testifying witness shows up dead.

To determine a protagonist’s internal motivations, you’ll want to think about his needs, desires, goals, dreams and fears. In the example of the aforementioned detective, he probably gains some satisfaction in protecting others from becoming future victims. Perhaps this is because one day when he was in school, he failed to protect his kid brother from bullies and has vowed he’ll never let down his guard again.

Ideally, these desires should in some way conflict with another in such a way that he is hesitant to resolve the central problem without making a personal sacrifice. Our detective, for example, probably also has a great motivation to always solve his cases per police protocol; he has a reputation for doing so, and for his own sense of self-worth, he needs the awe and respect it brings from his colleagues. Because he solves cases going by the book, this need will clash with his new desire to break the rules to meet his internal need of protecting others from harm. This internal conflict heightens the tension even more, as the only solution to solving the murder spree is to sacrifice something close to him, specifically his need for his colleague’s respect.

These internal motivations ought to make your protagonist both heroic and vulnerable. His motivations should be noble and never nefarious. Such is the case with the detective’s desire to protect. (Self-worth derived from his colleague’s recognition is neutral on the heroic scale, if he remains humble in public about his success.) Motivations can be wrongheaded, however. Neither his desire for perfectionism nor for self-worth primarily derived from his colleague’s respect are sustainable, after all, and show a need for emotional growth. That need makes our detective vulnerable and creates the basis for a great story.

As these internal motivations play a key role in the tale, they ought to be hinted at on your story’s very first page. In my novel “Windmill,” the protagonist Peter Steinar’s internal motivation that drives his decisions is the need to emotionally connect with his father. Consider the following passage from the novel’s opening page:

Though dust spiraled in thick furrows off the gravel road then across the vast, barren fields, Peter Steinar hesitated climbing down the windmill. He instead left his father and brother standing below to watch the approaching burgundy-colored car as sunlight and wind burned the land raw in a river of heat.

“Here must be that news reporter now,” said father, beckoning for him.

Peter rolled his eyes but began his descent. Upon reaching the ground, his father handed him a handkerchief. It did little good. Red granules of prairie loam whirled upon the wind like thick swarms of gnats, and the old man blinked slowly. Peter searched for a hint of anticipation in that vacant face, saw only a thick line drooping beneath zombie-like eyes and skin damp from the swelter.

Peter’s internal motivation is inferred in the passage’s last sentence. He hopes to see some excitement in his father but doesn’t. Though both physically are sweating, their eyes (the window to the soul) behave quite differently; Peter’s are alive, but his father’s is like the living dead. The don’t connect emotionally.

Finally, always reveal these internal motivations by showing the character's personality through his actions, thoughts and dialogue. Never tell them through exposition as was written in this explanation of internal motivations about the detective. Telling internal motivations rather than inferring (by showing) actually undercuts the level of suspense and tension they bring to the story.

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